Something is terribly wrong.
I'm in shock. Something called (I can't even say it) f--- g---- t-- (a word I've never used in my life, or any of my posts) is somehow (seriously, I defy you to find the word t--) mistakenly (or, for that matter, b---) associated with this blog.
I think there was a misunderstanding.
It's all just a terrible mistake.
I'd like to say that there has been a mix up.
Now I'm crying.
Now I'm making a tomato sandwich.
Not good to eat right before bed, but I've had a shock, and I didn't have anything for dinner. I need a sandwich.
I'll be right back..
Yes. I'm glad I ate that sandwich. And, seriously, I'm starving. I think I'll make another.
Update: Ok, I made another sandwich. But then I got an idea. I realized that the part of the day that I hate most (the making of my lunch for the next day) could be over right now if I just put this second sandwich immediately into a baggie, and into the fridge.
So that's what I did.
Sometimes I think I might die from the boredom of the making of future sandwiches. It's just so tedious. But, wow, how great that I made my lunch for the next day and didn't at all suffer from the effects of doing so. Sneaky.
And now I'm having a cigarette. But all I have are fire place matches for some reason, which is ridiculous, and kind of kills the whole convienence of smoking.
I'm smoking anyway. Just to be clear. Despite the yard long match. I would die of laughter if someone (out of nowhere, totally unexpected) lit my cigarette with this kind of match at a party, or out somewhere. That would deffinitely get my attention.