my dumb town

A few months ago I did a strange thing.

I felt that it was strange.

I mean, even I.

(I realize that it's subjective)

The only reason I mention this right now - is, as a result I find myself walking blocks out of my way to avoid this piano bar that's in my neighborhood.

And if one is avoiding it, as piano bars go - it couldn't be situated more inconveniently.

Because this piano bar is everywhere I go.

Not that anyone is ever at this piano bar, not at least until very late at night.

But it's the bills - the bills posted all over the front of this piano bar, that I'm trying to avoid.

(not any actual people)

It's a long story.

(switching gears)

I found out definitively that Earwax is no longer renting movies.

At first they said things like, "We're remodeling the downstairs".

I thought, "..how nice."

Maybe they're having the mildew smell removed, too.

But then they started saying things like, "..we may or may not be renting movies ever again."

Which sounded like they weren't really remodeling anymore.

(and, I had suspected that they weren't)

Then, it was things like, "check back."

Which was hopeful.

Hopeful in a bullshit way, that - even though it's bullshit, one tends to accept (as though there must be some mystery going on that one must accept - because such mysteries are beyond the lay person: I don't know the inner workings of Earwax = I accept "check back" as a possible condition of the very mysteries of Earwax).

Because not everything is meant to be privy to one.

And that was ok with one - with me.

All I wanted was an answer.

Even if I was afraid of the answer. I wanted an answer.

But I didn't really want any answer.

Because I knew the answer and I didn't like the answer.

Then my boyfriend just went in and got an answer.

That was yesterday.

He told me the bad news while handing me a pint of Chunky Monkey.

To his credit, I had been relying heavily on Chunky Monkey for a while.

Meanwhile our Netflix had arrived - so there was that, too.

What with Earwax gone.

(the cafe is still up and running, but, truly, I never associated the two. Yes, I had eaten there, but it never felt like I was "eating at my movie rental place" - never did).

The guy at Earwax Cafe did offer my boyfriend a tip about another movie place located about a mile west of here.

I don't know - that's a mile away.

That's a whole other thing.

And he mentioned that many people have been upset by this turn of events.

But they "just weren't making enough money on the movie rentals anymore" kind of thing.

Which made me think of my late fees.

My late fees. Alone.

All those times I was late (every single time) I liked to think that my late fees made a difference - somehow.

And, I couldn't have been later.

Really.

(I couldn't have)